A Leap of Faith

I’ve felt drawn to stay put for the last few weeks, have a simple existence, be homely, and sit at my computer every day. I’ve become so settled I’ve almost forgotten what it’s like to be on the move discovering new things.

My time has been happily dedicated to a combination of writing, catching up with friends and family, and working with good old social media.

For the last few days I’ve been gradually building up a portfolio of LIKES on my new facebook page. Something I’ve never been interested in doing before, but now enjoying the focus and finding it fun. I’m never going to add ALL the things I like because frankly I’ve got far better things to do with my time – like get this book drafted or even go outside. But for some reason I was drawn to bring together a few samples…

Yesterday I found myself drifting on facebook (as it can tend to lure one into doing) and looking up a band called Crystal Castles. This band have held some significance to me for the last couple of months, and for certain reasons I’ve avoided listening to them even though I really like their music.

There was an emotional charge behind researching them, a little like the feeling of reading an email from an ex-partner that you still have feelings for. I was drawn to look them up, but at the same time I was nervous of the emotions that might arise.

I discovered that the band were about to begin a tour and the first date they were playing was 12th May in San Diego. Relative to the size of this country, effectively just down the road. And it’s the only gig that’s available to the public in the US right now. A few hours later my housemate told me I have an invite from a family friend of theirs to go and visit the city… San Diego calling by any chance?

Since I’ve become such a homebody recently I’ve become something of a stranger to moving around and seeing opportunities pop up, so I was going to wait for a 3rd sign before making any plans. But since spending a couple of hours last night sat up in bed, downloading their music and looking into transport options I just feel I have to go.

It’s really interesting how on this occasion my research into public transport was quick and easy, and the information was very accessible, whereas on all previous attempts I’ve continuously reached dead-ends and almost thrown my laptop out the window. It’s like I’m being told, now it’s time to go out and explore…

The deal with Crystal Castles is that it was music shared at a very poignant time a couple of months ago. Two tracks in particular I loved (Baptism and Courtship Dating) and then became locked in my head on an accutely challenging day and I became haunted by their music. I decided it was time to listen to it again, explore and embrace the emotions stirred, and use the experience to write about that period.

I heard the tracks in question for the first time in 2 months last night – the experience was intense, painful and beautiful at the same time. I feel the urge to be in an atmosphere where I can really feel it, let myself go and dive into the emotions associated. So I’ve just booked my ticket and I’m feeling really good about going on a trip to somewhere new again. After this period of rest and recuperation, I’m definitely ready to have another little taste of adventure…